It’s not lying if you get away with it.

I do go on about kitchen retailers pretending their kitchens would usually cost twice as much, or pretending you’ll lose a lot of money if you don’t buy one RIGHT NOW! I keep saying Hurry Up And Buy, Before The Price Stays The Same!

I can’t read minds. I’m assuming intention. It might be accidental that these retailers keep saying things in ways that would make a reasonable person draw a conclusion which isn’t true. I just don’t think that’s likely, and the Advertising Standards Authority tends to agree.

There are people – especially some retailers – who say, Who cares? Caveat Emptor and all that: if people are silly enough to fall for it, that’s their look-out.

I don’t think deceiving people is either clever or an acceptable way to do business, but, yes, that’s just an opinion. Some people think it is clever, and acceptable.

But some other people say that it wouldn’t be allowed if it was really bad, would it?

Allowed by whom?

Nobody actively polices retail marketing. Trading Standards can take up a complaint, and even prosecute, if you’ve been ripped off, but that’s after the fact. The ASA, similarly, will investigate a complaint about advertising – if someone complains, and, again, after the fact. Publishers of advertising will try to anticipate whether they might be implicated in such a complaint, and what the consequences might be, and weigh that against their need to sell ad space.

And what happens if the ASA finds that advertising has been misleading? They tell the retailer not to do it again. Oo-er. By that time, of course, the retailer’s enjoyed the benefit of the misleading advertising: they’ve taken the sales, thanks very much.

Offenders tend to be repeat offenders. That is, when they get caught misleading people, they adjust their wording slightly – and then tend to get caught again. It’s almost as if misleading people isn’t accidental at all.

Wren misleads on comparisons.

Wren misleads on discounts and on offer ends.

Wren misleads on comparisons.

Wickes misleads on discounts.

Wren misleads on offer ends.

Wren misleads on discounts.

Wickes misleads on discounts.

What are they up to now? 23/01/2020

Wren ended another don’t-miss-out offer last night. They even stayed open until 10 at night again, to make sure that nobody missed out.

Judging by the offers advertised, nobody missed out. Screenshots below are before the fantastic offers ended, and after. Spot the difference.

Magnet and Wickes don’t seem to be advertising end dates for their Winter Sales: the Sale goes on forever, which does seem to be the truth. Right now, Wren is the only one still trying to make us think we’ll lose a lot of money if we don’t buy RIGHT NOW. That’s not true.

Hurry up and buy, before the price stays the same!

What are they up to now? 11/01/2020

Completing the set: we saw a few days ago how Magnet said “these offers” were going to end, but most of them didn’t, and we saw how Wickes said theirs had to end – and they did.

Wren said “selected offers” were ending on Wednesday, and they stayed open until 10PM so that nobody would miss out.

So what ended? I mean, there’s money off everything, as always, but which offers were available before Wednesday and aren’t now? If anything, there are more.

Hurry up and buy, before the price stays the same.

Cheaper than cheap

It’s got better. There was a time when it seemed like all the sheds promised to “beat any quote”.

Obviously, they couldn’t all be cheaper than each other.

What they really meant was that there was a secret pocket of extra discount available, which could be accessed if you could persuade a store manager, or sometimes a regional manager or head office, that you’d buy elsewhere if they wouldn’t give you the competitor’s price, and the products weren’t too dissimilar.

The best times to ask were late on a Saturday – because that’s when most retailers’ week ends, and there are always targets to be met -, or in the last minutes before an offer “ended”: advertised prices might not actually go up the next day, but there would be high expectations, and retailers desperate to satisfy them.

Requests wouldn’t always be met. There was always the get-out that the two products weren’t actually comparable – even if they were really the same and from the same source, which happens, one retailer calls them X and the other calls them Y -, and, anyway, the decision of the deciding authority, whether manager or at head office, was final.

As the photo above shows, We Beat Any Price was for a long time part of Wren’s whole identity. Right now, they lean more on their detailed cabinet-by-cabinet comparison. Only Wickes and Howdens seem to be still duking this one out:

Speed Berry

I may have sold the last one of these kitchens, a few years ago. The Berry colour was being discontinued by Nobilia, and I had a customer in love with it. I had to design it and send the design to Nobilia in Germany, before they’d agree to supply it.

She was over the moon.

What are they up to now? 04/01/2020

At Wren, selected offers end Wednesday. Which ones? The link doesn’t say. Yes, they really do stay open until 10pm that night – in case there’s a queue.

At Wickes, as we know already, half price ends Monday. Will they be full price on Tuesday?

Homebase’s Wren-model multibuy discount means the offer doesn’t have to end, but they’ve chucked in a ton:

At Magnet, “these offers” end today – but only one shows an end date. What will happen tomorrow?

What’s it worth?

When Wren introduced the “worth £200” claim on its free design service, its staff were told that it stacked up, because John Lewis charged £200. Everybody else did it free.

Others imitated, as they do. This was Wickes, in September 2019:

However, this is Wickes today:

This is Homebase:

Even Howdens:

Here’s the thing, though: John Lewis – which has been through a bit of a kitchens supply adventure – now charges a “redeemable” £50 – leaving Wren’s value claim, as far as I can see, unsupported.